The first two articles in this four-part series on Emotional Intelligence (EQ) (part I, part 2) introduced the overall concept and explored the characteristics that are widely believed to make up what is termed “personal competence”—our ability to stay aware of our emotions and manage our behavior and tendencies. The last two installments will focus on the traits that make up our “social competence”—our ability to understand other people’s moods, behaviors, and motives to improve the quality of our relationships.

We begin with social awareness, which is defined by Travis Bradberry and Jean Greaves in Emotional Intelligence 2.0 as the ability to “recognize and understand the moods of other individuals and entire groups of people. It’s the ability to observe body language, facial expressions, and even posture in an effort to respond appropriately.” These nonverbal cues represent the major portion of how others are communicating with you. They let you know how others are really feeling, how their emotional state is changing from minute to minute, and what is truly important to them.